Brewed Beverage of Choice: A Half Litre of Oktoberfest (I brewed one on Friday and had to have one to celebrate)
I am not completely sure of what has transpired over the past week as it pertains to my mind, my consciousness, my chaos. Whatever has happened, it has caused a great swell. Some may say I have experienced a moment of Satori. Perhaps it is just an opening of the mind. It would be futile attempting to explain it. So I will just be happy with the swell.
It began, as best as I can recollect, on Tuesday when I re-arranged the apartment and moved my bed back into the back room. This freed up a lot of space in the front room and created a divide between where I live and where I sleep. So does feng shui exist? Did the re-arrangement bring on the freedom of mind? Or was it the freedom that allowed me to re-arrange? Again, does it matter? To me it was the realization of the newly opened.
Since that day, things that would normally cause me nights of sleeplessness, hours of contemplation and uncertainty, and general disorder (not chaos, but confusion…there is a difference,) simply rolled off my back. I was in the moment. I was riding the wave. What had happened, simply just happened and I moved on to the next moment. At 10:30 I went to bed and slept, waking at 5:30 the next day. I was that simple.
So today, after a horrendous day of waiting for my spoke to be replaced which took far too long and having to de-train because of an erroneous driver, a thought came to me as I read D.T. Suzuki. Weeks ago I would have just ignored the thought and kept on doing whatever it was I was doing. At this moment I grabbed the pen and my journal and wrote down the storm that was brewing in my consciousness. The chaos had returned and I welcomed her. The following are just two of the thoughts:
Hanging from the branch of an oak,
despite my fear, I let go.
The short distance between
the ground and I: a surprise,
as was the bed of lillies
now engulfing me.
The tea-cup emptied
yet the sweet, scent remains.
From the table I rise
travel to the sink
and wash the cup.
I cannot explain the thoughts with any great detail. Each person will have their own interpretation. I know what I was thinking when I wrote these and it was as if a bolt of lightning struck. I should tell you I have bigger and greater news, but that can wait. Besides this is much more earth shattering to me. Enjoy the holiday for me. Work beckons again tomorrow.
Prost!
the confucian brewer